You have signed up for your account, uploaded your picture and profile information, and now you are ready to step out into the world of online dating. At this point, many people get stuck because they do not know how to open up the conversation. This is not surprising since starting off a conversation with someone you have never met before can be a little fearful at least at first. After all, it's tricky enough to speak to someone face-to-face, going to an online message service is another matter entirely.
Find Common Interests
The easiest way to start up a conversation is to look over the profile of the person you find interesting and look for points of common interests. For example, if you see that they enjoy camping, then start off the conversation by asking what they enjoy about going outdoors. Remember, your interests in a subject may not be the same as theirs, so do not assume anything. Just start by asking them about the things they posted as their likes and go from there.
Here, you'll want to ask a little about them while you reveal a little about yourself. A good place to start is asking them questions about an interest of theirs that you find interesting. It doesn't have to be about a subject that you are dedicated. For example, if you see that they enjoy stamp collecting, ask them what got them interested in the hobby. You may find that they will ask the same questions about your interests. It's important to remember that there are many happy couples who do not share the same interest in hobbies, but they do respect each other's interests.
Self-depreciation is a good characteristic to have when engaging in online conversation. This is because texts and messages can only relate the words that are typed, not spoken. There is little in the way of subtlety or nuance when it comes to writing words on a screen. So, being self-depreciating in a healthy way can help break the ice when it comes to starting up a conversation. For example, if you see that they enjoy skiing, you can start by saying you never made it down the mountain upright. Whatever breaks the ice in a positive manner will help get you started.
Less is More
Being misunderstood or misinterpreted is one of the biggest concerns that many people have when communicating through messages and texts. So, don't try to be elaborative when messaging. Instead, try to condense your words into simple, easy to understand phrases that leave little room for being misunderstood.
Of course, it helps to be complimentary in your conversation as that will help in getting your message across. Also, it pays to be careful about making assumptions as that can lead to misunderstandings. The bottom line is just be yourself and talk to the person as if you were talking in public. That way, at least you will be in the right frame of mind to communicate effectively with someone online.This entry was posted by Samuel on 12/4/2016